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The Red Diary

22 March 2017 10:49AM

March 22, 1962

Dear Red,
Shit hits the fan. Dreamboat called. Photographs of me in Mexico with Fields
“the communist” landed on his desk. It’s hard to believe the powers that be
waste their time on this kind of stuff. I fly off to Palm Springs for the weekend.
Sh’ma…


21 March 2017 08:21AM

March 21, 1962

Dear Red,
I feel like a cold baked potato with catsup all over it— that’s what I used to live on
as a starving model. When I used to get all made up to attend a half-assed party full of reefer just to get a…


20 March 2017 07:57AM

Dear Red,
Weinstein gave me his daily pep talk but he doesn’t give a damn. He’ll be out of a job if I “misbehave.” Pat asked how I felt about Jackie. I’m sure Jack and Jackie have their secrets but his sleeping around is not one…


19 March 2017 09:36AM

March 19, 1962

Dear Red,
My friend Norman Rosten got me started writing poetry. I showed this poem to Pat.
She’s a strict Catholic and says I’m an education! We spend so much time together
on scripts, photo shoots, interviews, press conferences, and running around town,
I forget I might…


18 March 2017 10:03AM

March 18, 1962

Dear Red,
I was soaking in Chanel No.5 when the doorbell rang. Mrs. Murray was out so Pat
answered. She was surprised to see the General but brought him in to me. Later
she asked if I love both brothers. I don’t, I said. But what…


16 March 2017 08:56AM

March 16, 1962

Dear Red,
I put on a muumuu, wrapped my head in a scarf, and bought a dozen red roses. It’s
Aunt Grace Goddard’s birthday – she died nine years ago of suicide. I felt like
being alone with her at the Westwood Memorial Park Cemetery. It…


15 March 2017 08:29AM

March 15, 1962

Dear Red,
Mary Karger surprised me with a bottle of Champagne— we drove north and swam
and talked on a blanket where nobody could bug us. We stopped at Dutton’s
books on the way home. When she dropped me off I gave her a…


14 March 2017 08:24AM

March 14, 1962

Dear Red,
I’m starting to get the gist of you! Reading back through these pages, I see
I’ve got a budding relationship with myself. A love story between me, myself,
and I. And I want to know more. I’m the opposite…


13 March 2017 09:27AM

March 13, 1962

Dear Red,
I called Kenny my favorite astrologer about doing a special reading for my 36th
birthday. I’m getting OLD! In the magnifying mirror I see seven little lines around each eye. I mean, I admit, they’re from smiling, so how bad is that? I…


12 March 2017 07:32AM

March 12, 1962

Dear Red,
Reading scripts by the pool Pat said she wanted to set up a photo session with Vogue. I stuck out my tongue. I don’t want to model clothes, I said. You are looking better than ever, she said– it must be all…


11 March 2017 09:55AM

March 11, 1962

Dear Red,
The late night yesterday really turned me upside down. It’s four in the morning and
my mind is ON, my body OFF. No one’s ass for me to put my hand on. No one to call. No god to pray to. No soft…


10 March 2017 08:36AM

March 10, 1962

Dear Red,
I’m just home from an all-night party at the Dennison’s. Not a typical Hollywood
party. I watched the sun rise with a lot of long-haired beatnik intellectuals.
Doctors talking philosophy, artists talking about the Adelle Davis diet, scientists
talking about psychedelic…


9 March 2017 11:21AM

March 9, 1962

Dear Red,
I like my hair in a flip but in an hour Agnes is coming over to cut it short
for Somethings Got to Give. I bought a dozen colored hula hoops— it must be
spring! I really hadn’t gotten back into a…


8 March 2017 09:07AM

March 8, 1962

Dear Red,
I took Tashi by my favorite lemon tree on Odessa Street and it was blooming!
He is teaching me to garden. My gloves were full of dirt when Maf started barking,
I didn’t realize he fell in the pool! Tashi rescued him and Mrs.…


7 March 2017 09:19AM

March 7, 1962

Dear Red,
My second meeting with Dreamboat was in 1953. He said: You’ve become a big star since we met— I think of you everyday. That makes two of us, I said, but you’re engaged! I’m running for president of the United States in 1960…


7 March 2017 09:17AM

March 6, 1962

Dear Red,
All the stars were twinkling! Not the usual merry-go-round. I was a little
tipsy because I didn’t eat for two days and gulped two glasses of Champagne once
we arrived. We didn’t stay long. I must have sweated those last…


6 March 2017 08:15AM

March 5, 1962

Dear Red,
Going to the Golden Globe Awards tonight. Elizabeth Arden Salon gave me a three-hour head to toe massage and beauty treatment in my living room! Hair is done. Whitey will be here any minute to do my make-up. I’m wearing a…


5 March 2017 09:31AM

March 4, 1962

Dear Red,
Unpacking books is like saying hello to old friends. I counted more than 400—
many from my literature classes at UCLA eleven years ago. I found Arthur’s Death
of a Salesman: “1954, To Marilyn, with admiration, Arthur Miller.” That was the
night I escorted him…


4 March 2017 09:28AM

March 4, 1962

Dear Red,
Unpacking books is like saying hello to old friends. I counted more than 400—
many from my literature classes at UCLA eleven years ago. I found Arthur’s Death
of a Salesman: “1954, To Marilyn, with admiration, Arthur Miller.” That was the
night I…


3 March 2017 08:54AM

March 3, 1962

Dear Red,
My Hulda Dombek customized bras arrived! They’re like pyramids in black, red, coral, and sky blue! For sleeping, of course. I wouldn’t dream of wearing something like that under a dress— people want to look at me,…


2 March 2017 09:28AM

March 2, 1962

Dear Red,
The Walt Disney Company called to say they created Tinkerbell in my image!
She’s mother of the lost boys and spreads fairy dust in Never Never Land! Disney
wants to know what kind of royalties I want. I told Frosch to send…


1 March 2017 09:06AM

March 1, 1962

Dear Red,
A plane crashed on takeoff near Idlewild Airport today killing all 87 passengers!
It’s scary to think how many times I’ve taken off from there without saying the
Sh’ma or even a Hail Mary. Good news, I lost five pounds in Mexico. Jeanne Carmen…


28 February 2017 10:04AM

February 28, 1962

Dear Red,
I never think of you as communist. I won’t give up the nickname. Besides, it
IS your color. Red should be free of political meaning. Red is apple.
Sunsets. Lips. Blood. Mother’s hair, well, she dyed it. We shopped after…


27 February 2017 07:09AM

February 27, 1962

Dear Red,
Bolanos lives in beautiful Las Lomas with streets named after mountains, and the
houses are walled mansions. Grasshopper Hill Park is a palace built by the Aztec
poet-king, Montezuma. His mother had an immaculate conception– she swallowed a hollow arrow containing…


26 February 2017 11:47AM

February 26, 1962

Dear Red,
I took my diary along with me today so I could write these names down– Paso de la Reforma is tree-lined like the Champs-Elysees with embassies, the Monument to
the Revolution with four arches, the Angel of Independence, and the Museum
of…

 

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